Telling someone you’re not interested should be enough, but unfortunately most men have been conditioned to think that the more they try, the higher the chances you’ll say yes. Dealing with their advances isn’t pleasant, but there are plenty of ways to get them to leave you alone.
When you’re dealing with guys who won’t take no for an answer, it’s important not to engage too much. If they want an honest answer as to why you’re not interested, give it, but don’t let them push your around. Forget about your compassionate nature, and don’t allow yourself to be manipulated by a creep, no matter how “nice” he might seem.
1. Always Be Direct
Giving false hope is the last thing you want to do, since that might extend his relentless attempts to get you to go out with him. Saying “I’m not interested” should be enough, but for many men it’s a signal to double down. If he continues to insist, follow it up with a “Please stop talking to me”. You might think that’s a rude thing to say, but he’s already stepped over social boundaries by not accepting your refusal.
2. Ignore Him
If he’s still trying, the silent treatment is the best way of dealing with guys who won’t take no for an answer. Turn your back to him and pretend he’s not even there. If he’s harassing you with texts or messages on social media, never respond. Don’t even read them, delete them right away, and do not take his calls.
Once he stepped over common sense and kept trying despite your rejection, it’s OK to lie. Tell him you’ve started dating someone else, tell him you’re a lesbian, tell him you only date guys who are [insert his exact opposite here]. Tell him you’re really into butt stuff, but it’s his butt you’re talking about, not yours.
See also: How to Do Online Dating Safely and Successfully
4. Walk Away
When strangers approach you in public places, it’s fine to react aggressively. You don’t have to take anything from anyone. If he’s trying to hit on you, just walk away. You can also raise your voice as you leave to let others around know he’s upsetting you with the unwanted attention. Dealing with guys who won’t take no for an answer can sometimes make you feel like you’re overreacting, but you shouldn’t let that soften you up.
5. Be Obnoxious
If you’re dealing with someone who’s just annoying, but isn’t a threat in any way, a good solution to making him leave you alone is to be more obnoxious than he is. Ask him to change his wardrobe and his hair if he wants a shot. Then ask him to take up sunrise yoga and tap dancing.
6. Talk About Your Ex
Another way of dealing with guys who won’t take no for an answer is to make them feel like they’re getting themselves into something that’s not that great. Start talking about your ex, and about everything you used to do together. Compare him to your ex, but never favorably. Your ex was better than him in every way, and he needs to hear that.
7. Talk About Therapy
“My therapist says that in just a few more months of regular sessions, I’ll finally be able to get over my extreme hoarding!” might not be something you ever thought you’d say, but when you’re dealing with a really annoying guy and this will get him off your back, why not?
8. Pretend to Be Crazy
When he genuinely thinks he’s a nice guy, and not the creep who’s relentlessly stalking you, one way of dealing with guys who won’t take no for an answer is to make them run. Start talking about baby names made up of combinations of your names. After that, tell him that you’ve always dreamed of getting into porn when you’re pregnant.
9. Take It Up with HR
If your nuisance is a coworker, you should only reject him publicly once, and make sure you take note of who’s around and heard you. After that, if he’s still trying to get you to go out with him, the best course of action is filling a complaint with the HR department.
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10. Document Any Stalking
Sometimes dealing with guys who won’t take no for an answer means you’ll have to get the police or campus security involved. If he’s been at it for a while, make a note of each incident so you can file a report against him. Hopefully it won’t get to that, and he’ll go away much sooner, but you should be prepared for the worst.