Just because men like to pretend they’re strong doesn’t mean that your words can’t cut them deeply. Check out a few things you should never say to a guy, which may make him feel as bad as you would if he said: “Those jeans make you look fat.”

Whether or not your intention is to hurt him, these few phrases can have a lot of power and push him away, even if you didn’t really mean to be insulting or dismissive when you uttered them to your man or your new crush.

We Need to Talk...

If you want to instantly raise his heart rate and make him think of every worst case scenario possible, these 4 words always do the trick. Whether you’re planning on asking him to buy low fat milk instead of regular or want to discuss something important about your relationship, this is never the way to approach it. “We need to talk” just instantly puts him in panic mode and makes him defensive right off the bat.

Are You Done?

Out of all the things you should never say to a guy during sex, this one is probably the worst. If he wasn’t done before, he definitely is now. There’s so much wrong with this line, from the implication that you’re a passive participant in sex to the idea that you can’t wait to get out of bed, that you should never say it out loud.

That’s So Cute!

He won’t like it when you’re talking about his new T-shirt or his haircut, but he will instantly hate it when you’re talking about one of his body parts, especially his penis or his tummy. He needs to feel strong and masculine, so being labeled as cute is one of the last things he wants to hear from you. It doesn’t matter if you mean it in an emasculating way, that’s how he’ll see it.

Size Doesn’t Matter.

There are many penis related things you should never say to a guy, but “size doesn’t matter” is definitely among the worst. If it didn’t matter you wouldn’t bring it up, and when you say it, most guys will hear “It doesn’t matter if you’re on the small side. I can learn to live with your tiny and inadequate penis.”

Relationship Killers

More: 10 Biggest Relationship Killers

Man Up!

Reinforcing harmful gender stereotypes is never good, but “man up!” is a particularly offensive way of telling a guy he’s not living up to your expectations. Before you say it, think about what it really means to him. You’re saying that he’s not disappointing to you, but he’s also generally inadequate. Belittling your partner in never healthy for your relationship.

There’s This Thing My Ex Used to Do...

Out of the worse things you should never say to a guy, this one is the worst when it’s related to something sexual. Mentioning your past sex experiences with your exes will always make him feel like he’s being compared to them all the time. You don’t have to pretend you don’t have a sexual history, just avoid the “ex” part. “There’s this thing I really like...” works much better.

Why Are You Being So Immature?

Calling your boyfriend immature automatically makes you sounds like a mother figure, and that’s not the way he wants to think of you. Even putting aside how it’s insulting, there’s no way of saying it without sounding like you’re scolding a child.

Nevermind. I’ll Do It Myself...

Once you ask him for help, you better let him help. Men are natural problem solvers and they’ll do their best to fix a problem for you in order to get praise and feel appreciated. That’s why this is definitely one of the things you should never say to a guy. If you got him involved, don’t just put an end to it abruptly, unless you actually want to hurt his self worth.

See also: Worst Relationship Advice Ever

Worst Girlfriend

I Don’t Want to Live Without You.

This can definitely sound romantic a few years into a relationship, but saying it too soon makes you look clingy and desperate. Some men appreciate a woman who depends on them for everything, but most will want a little distance if you say it too soon.

Just Give Up. You Can’t Do It...

Even if he’s trying to fix the electrical system and is in danger of being electrocuted, find a nicer way of telling him it’s a job for a professional. It’s one of the things you should never say to a guy because it will instantly make him feel like a loser.