Moving in together can be a big deal for your relationship, and you shouldn’t downplay the issues that might come with it. Fortunately, you can solve them together, as long as you’re open to compromise and a little planning.
Learn more about the problems every couple has after moving in together, and the ways to solve them before they turn ugly. From splitting chores to feeling suffocated when you spend too much together, here are the issues most couples go through after the big move.
1. Dealing with the Housework
Taking on roughly equal amounts of chores is important when you first move in together, to avoid the unpleasant feeling that one of you is a maid and in charge of everything. It’s important to talk housework through, and be open to the chores your significant other really hates. If either of you doesn’t stick to the plan, have another talk to solve the issue.
2. Figuring Out the Financial Arrangements
Money is one of the problems every couple has after moving in together, specifically deciding how to take care of the shared expenses. It’s not wise to combine all your money, but you should get a joint account for necessities. That way, you each get to spend your own money the way you want to, while the bills won’t go unpaid.
3. Sharing a Bathroom
A lot of people think that the romance will take a hit once you start sharing a bathroom, but they key to dealing with this increase of physical intimacy is to set up some rules. Once you’re on the same page on the do’s and dont’s, you should be able to avoid this issue. Discuss everything from cleaning the bathroom to the way the toilet seat should stay.
See also: 10 Rules to Make Open Relationships Work
4. Feeling Suffocated
Going from spending a few nights a week together to every single one isn’t a must. You should actually spend a bit more time with your friends, in order to balance things out and avoid one of the problems every couple has after moving in together. Remember that it’s important to leave each other alone for a while after an argument that couldn’t be solved.
5. Failing to Improve Your Communication
There are a lot of fights that can start because you each have different expectations from the situation, but don’t take your communication to the next level. Choose your battles and make sure he knows what you want and need. Talk about it when you’re both relaxed, and approach sensitive issue tactfully.
6. Dealing with Different Views on Your Home
One of the problems every couple has after moving in together is managing different needs from the environment. You should both feel at home, and that can be difficult when one of you wants to control everything from the furniture to what goes up on the walls. For old furniture, reupholstering can be the compromise that helps it blend in a new room with a different aesthetic.
7. Struggling with TV Time
A DVR can help out, but you’ll still run into situations where each of you wants to watch different live TV. This can be a test for the way you handle conflict and compromise. Give and take so you can both be happy, and remember that you need more quality time than just watching TV together.
8. Scheduling Sex
Even when everything else goes smoothly, sex can cause quite a few of the problems every couple has after moving in together. Some couples deal with mismatched expectation when it comes to frequency, others notice a drop off in their desire. Be open to communication and don’t let the problem go on for too long without addressing it.
9. Compromising Too Much
You can’t have a happy relationship without compromising, but you can definitely take it too far. There’s no point in choosing a solution that makes you both unhappy. Instead, prioritize and decide how you can both be happy, while also sacrificing a little.
10. Focusing on What’s Next
Even when you haven’t rushed your relationship, one of the problems every couple has after moving in together is feeling pressure for the next step. Whether it’s having a baby, getting engaged or married, don’t allow the next big thing to stress you out. Just enjoy this phase of your relationship before moving forward.