There are a lot of useful old school dating rules that increase the success of a good matching, but many are outdated and can end up doing more harm than good. Instead of playing games, be yourself at the start of the dating process, and you’ll have a much higher chance at finding the right match.
Here are the dating rules you should break, in order to increase your shot at having a good time and getting a successful start to your new relationship.
1. Avoiding Any “Serious” Talk on the First Date
One of the more traditional dating rules is that you should avoid any “serious” discussion on the first date, whether it’s politics, religion, or how many kids you want to have. If they’re dealbreakers, getting these things out of the way is a good idea, as long as you keep the conversation casual and move on to them in the second half of the date.
2. Having Sex Based on a Predetermined Schedule
Among the dating rules you should break, few are sillier than the “no sex on the first date” or “sex on the third date” ones. Getting intimate is all about making a connection. Some casual hook ups can end in great relationships, and waiting to have sex because you feel you have to isn’t very mature. Whatever you decide, make sure that you’re in sync with your partner, don’t rush into it or wait to long for old fashioned reasons.
3. Turning Down Short Notice Plans
Playing games is a bad idea when you’re looking for a meaningful relationship. And saying no to an invite on principle because it’s too short notice is just counterproductive. If you want to see your partner, go ahead and accept any suggestion he has, as long as you don’t have to cancel your own plans for it.
4. Avoiding Talking about an Ex
Definitely one of the dating rules you should break, the “no ex talk” can also end up creating trouble. It’s perfectly fine to mention a break up or a divorce, as long as you don’t keep talking about it for too long. Focus on the lessons you’ve learned about yourself from the previous relationship, don’t tell your date how unlucky you are with men.
5. Moving On If There’s No Instant Chemistry
If you believe in love at first sight, you’ll probably end up alone. Same thing for believing that you should only date people with instant chemistry. If the first date goes well and you find a lot of things in common, from hobbies to fundamental values, give your guy another chance. Chemistry can develop once you get to know each other a bit better, but you should look for at least a single spark.
6. Letting Him Always Pay So He Feels Like “The Man”
Some men feel emasculated if they don’t pay for everything, others will get offended if you don’t contribute at all. Letting the man pay is definitely one of the dating rules you should break, perhaps after the first date. Don’t make a big deal out of it, and if he insists on paying for dinner, then you can pay for drinks or coffee.
7. Counting on Your Date for Condoms
Few things ruin the mood faster than getting in the mood and then stopping after the clothes come off because nobody has a condom. Don’t rely on your date to always have condoms, you’re the one with the extra storage space in your purse.
8. Always Sticking to Your Type
Only going out with guys that fit your Prince Charming mold is definitely one of the dating rules you should break. Even if you don’t end up going on a second date with someone who isn’t your type, it’s important to focus on the most important things in a relationship, like shared values and emotional compatibility.
See also: How to Enjoy a Blind Date
9. Assuming Exclusivity After a Set Number of Dates
Whether you met your date online, in a bar, or through a friend, you should never make assumptions about exclusivity. There’s no set number of dates for it. If you’re looking for a monogamous relationship that starts right now, bring it up openly.
10. Relying Too Much on Outside Opinions
If you feel you need to run any detail past your friends or your mother, that’s one of the dating rules you should break. The opinion of the people you love is always important, but make a real connection with your guy first.