Whether you wanted to end the relationship or your ex decided on his own to break up, seeing him move on can stir up a lot of negative feelings. Dwelling on it can only hurt you more, so it’s important that you handle this correctly.
Find out how to deal with your ex moving on, and cope with the flood of feelings that may make you feel like you’re going though the breakup all over again. Practice these simple steps and you’ll be able to put the relationship behind you and let go of any lingering feelings.
Accept That It’s Really Over
It doesn’t matter if you’re getting the news through a mutual acquaintance or you unfortunately run into your ex and his new girlfriend. The only thing you can change is your own feeling about it. Accept that your relationship has run its course and your ex is no longer invested in you in any way. Breathe in, count backwards from 10, and face the truth.
Figure Out Why You Still Care
If you’re not hanging on to any feelings or hopes for reconnecting, then you should figure out why you care that your ex isn’t single anymore. The right to deal with your ex moving on is to focus on yourself, and not make moving on a contest. Your ex might be making a mistake by jumping into a rebound relationship quickly, and you don’t have to do the same.
Put Up a Wall
When you’re still hurting everytime you’re faced with the fact that he moved on, it’s important to cut off any information sources. Take a break from talking to him and make it clear to any common friends or acquaintances that you don’t want to hear about it. Even if you’re trying to stay friends with your ex, take some time off.
Avoid Silly Comparisons
When you’re wondering how to deal with your ex moving on, you should know that the wrong way to go is to start comparing yourself to his new girlfriend. You have no idea what your ex wants from a new relationship, so any comparisons are a bad idea. Forget about his new relationship and focus on getting yourself ready to date again.
Find Strength in the Positive People in Your Life
Whether you feel comfortable talking about your feelings with friends or family, make sure you choose someone positive. Don’t expect them to listen patiently while you repeat the same negative emotions. Instead, try to lose the burden once you talk about it. Blowing up a little steam is healthy, but stop yourself from obsessing too much over the unfortunate situation.
Mute Your Ex on Social Media
Learning how to deal with your ex moving on also means you should reduce any online exposure to their newfound happiness. Mute them on Twitter and remove them from your Facebook Newsfeed without blocking them (clicking on “Following” deactivates the option). You don’t need to see pictures of your ex and his new girlfriend. But if you plan on being/staying friends with him, this is a temporary measure that benefits everyone.
See also: How to Motivate Yourself After a Breakup
Find the Silver Lining
Even if you feel like your relationship could have used another chance, you should try focusing on the good parts. You’ve just avoided a potentially hurtful on and off relationship that could have kept you stuck for years.
Don’t Try to Be Friends With Your Ex Right Now
Coping with the the thought of his new girlfriend is difficult enough. When you try to deal with your ex moving on, you can’t expect that you can be friends right away. You need some space and your ex should get that, even if he hopes to have a lasting friendship with you.
Focus on The Lessons You Learned
Even if seeing him move on feels horrible, you should count the things you’ve learned from the relationship that ended for good. That way, you’ll be a lot less likely to repeat the same mistakes in the future. Forget about the new girlfriend and cherish what you got out of your relationship with your ex.
Take Your Time When Moving On
Rushing into a new relationship as quickly as your ex did might do more emotional damage. Once you know how to deal with your ex moving on, you don’t have to make the same mistake. Take your time and work on yourself before starting something new.