More often than not, taking a break leads to a full breakup, but that’s linked to lack of communication more than the inevitability of the split. If you want to take a break without breaking up, find out how to increase your chances and help your relationship survive this difficult time.
Before taking a break, ask yourself a few important questions and make sure that you’re on the same page as your partner. Otherwise, the time off won’t have any other effect except prolonguing the breakup process.
Analyze the Reasons for Wanting a Break
If you’re generally sick of your partner, being apart for a limited time might not help at all. Any problems the relationship is facing won’t fix themselves either if you take time off. More valid reasons for taking a break including not being able to sustain a long distance relationship or having to focus on yourself for a little while in order to determine the future of a relationship.
Be Honest with Yourself
When you really want take a break without breaking up, make sure that you’re honest with yourself. If you believe this is a way of letting down your guy easy, you’re wrong. Taking a break generally makes the whole grieving process longer. If you know in your heart that what you really is to be single again or date someone else, just break up instead of dragging it out.
Accept What the Break Says About Your Relationship
Couples in a healthy relationship don’t take breaks, they work out their problems. Fear of commitment can often cause the need for a break, but if you can’t even find common ground for a few guidelines or rules when taking a break, then you’re probably better off breaking up.
Set Ground Rules
If you want your break to be more than the prelude to the breakup, it’s important to set rules. You might decide together that sex with other people is off the table, but casual dates are still acceptable. If the you’re willing take a break without breaking up for causes that have nothing to do with dating someone else, make sure you’re clear on staying exclusive during the break.
Ask Yourself If Time Can Fix the Issue
Most relationship issues don’t really get better while you’re taking a break. In fact, they can get much worse. If you’re hoping to escape a fundamental problem in your relationship by just ignoring it for a while, you’re on the wrong track.
Try to Work Out the Problem Without a Break
Instead of taking a break, how about working on your problems while taking a few mini breaks? A weekend getaway with your friends might help you get focused on what’s really important to you, but even a single night out can help. That way, you can take a break without breaking up and without actually taking a real break.
See also: Are You About to Get Dumped?
Don’t Extend Your Break too Much
The longer your vacation away from your relationship is, the higher the risk of one of you deciding to move on. A week or two should be enough to get your thoughts and feelings in order, and to make a decision about the future of your relationship. Extending your break for longer than that is playing with fire.
Communicate with Your Partner During the Break
Just because you take a break without breaking up doesn’t mean you have to build a wall between yourself and your partner. When you’re setting up the rules, also make sure to discuss the options for communication during the break. No communication is rarely the best option, but once you both decide on a course of action, stick to it.
Use Your Time Wisely
If you asked for a little time in order to find yourself and rethink your priorities, don’t waste your time going out with friends and ignoring the issues of your relationship. If you just want to forget you’re in a relationship for a couple of weeks, then you don’t really want to be in it at all.
Never Risk It a Second Time
Once you take a break without breaking up and you manage to stay together, don’t be naive enough to think you can pull it off for a second or third time. That’s basically an on-off relationship, and it says a lot about your maturity. Maybe you simply need to be single for a while to really figure out what you want, and that means a breakup, no more taking breaks.