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Anna Heerema

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Libra

Status

General
Female
06 Oct 1993

About
My names Anna, birthdays in October, favorite numbers 25, I got two older brothers who i adore, i got a boyfriend whos amazing his names mikey, anndddddd yeah lots more if you wanna know more message me up at Takethistoheart93@hotmail.com

  • 151 Rank

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takethistoheart93 asked:

24 Nov 2009

Boyfriends got a kid

Hay, im using my friends account



So me and this guy named jake decided to go out a long time ago

he is a really great guy so caring loving funny and honest

before he asked me out he told me had a 2 year old son

at the time i didnt reallly think of it that much but now i am

cause i see his son all the time with his sons mom

so its like me jake (bf) rikki ( his sons mom) and his son

soo it gets kinda awkward and his son calls me by my name but more then once i was babysitting him with jake and he called me mommy and it was like wow im not ready for that... im 16 and hes 17

i told jake how i feel, he felt bad and then i felt bad for making him feel bad

i mean i guess my question is... is it alright for me to feel upset / not ready about the situation cause sometimes i get upset about it, i mean i know theres nothing between him and his ex. girlfirend/sons mom buttt idk they did at one point...and idk if i have the he says its okay for me to be upset but i feel bad when i am i suck at explaining if you havent noticed.



i want to know...

what do i do? im in love with jake but he has a kid and he sees them all the time too. and sometimes i feel out of place. i tell him this and he feels bad for it and trys to make me more included but at the same time i dont want to be so much included in the kids life ( not that i dont like him, hes amazig) but more in jakes life then her...



FML is confusing ... =/, i suck at explaining if you havent noticed.



i want to know...

what do i do? im in love with jake but he has a kid and he sees them all the time too. and sometimes i feel out of place. i tell him this and he feels bad for it and trys to make me more included but at the same time i dont want to be so much included in the kids life ( not that i dont like him, hes amazig) but more in jakes life then her...



FML is confusing ... =/

Answers

jaydde_woodrow

jaydde_woodrow says:

Posted on 25 Nov 2009

ok if you feel bad about seeing jake and his ex, with the kid just try not to be around when they go to meet each other, i know that would be hard but thats one way around it. tell Jake how you feel about him and his ex, if he really loves you he will understand and try to make you feel more comfortable. you really just have to talk to Jake about it and go from there.

i hope i helped your situation is very hard.

fulltimepinklady

fulltimepinklady says:

Posted on 25 Nov 2009

yeah very hard situation. explain how you are younger and just arent ready to be a mother...and kinda feel like that sometimes. its perfectly natural, but if he does have the right to want a gf that is more ready to be placed in that role so he will either understand or decide its not gonna work out. but you need to tell him bc things arent going to get better they are only going to get more involved so you need to set some boundaries now and see how he takes it

barbipixi

barbipixi says:

Posted on 25 Nov 2009

sorry. but if you want to be in his life more he made a decision about 2 yrs ago to be a father. and he's living up to his responsibilities. if you want to be with him you have to be willing to try.



if you had a kid would you want a guy who didn't want to be apart of their life. knowing that if he chooses to not be that father figure your baby needs then maybe he won't be the responsible person with your relationship? maybe they're not as ready for a steady thing as you are.



my boyfriend stepped up to the job and i think he's awesome for that. he knows he'll never be her real dad but he totally helps out like a dad would. we've even had a talk about we both know he's not here to replace her dad but i totally love and respect him for being able to handle this situation.



if you're not ready that's fine but you need to try and take a stand where it's ok to be a 'friend' to the babe.



i admit it's really hard to be around your boyfriend's ex and you can tell him you feel strange around her in that sense but you need to be friendly (which i know you probly are) things may never feel normal in that sense but you may get comfortable enough to not have to visit with him everytime he goes to her place

ctl888

ctl888 says:

Posted on 26 Nov 2009

How long have you and Jake been together? See it is hard getting into a relationship with a person and finding out they have children, especially if you are not ready for children. Not only you are dating Jake but his child and you will run into times with the baby's mother as well. I believe that you do love Jake a lot and time will help you to become more and more comfortable with the situation. Do tell Jake how you feel but tell him just to give you time to adjust to everything. Glad to hear he is being a father to his child. You are a strong person for being with a guy that has a child at your age. I know I couldn't do it. For some reason young children make me really nervous.( i know I am wierd right?)

takethistoheart93

takethistoheart93 says:

Posted on 25 Nov 2009

thank you so much for the advice :) i really appreciate it tomorrow were going out for dinner so ill talk to him about it. i really do wanna make it work i mean i love him and his kid and i dont have anything against his ex but still weird. anyways thank you for the great advice

takethistoheart93

takethistoheart93 says:

Posted on 26 Nov 2009

thank you so much for the response, the situation has given me a lot to think about. I've decided to try and make it work because he is an amazing guy and i love him and he is an amazing father. We have talked about it and he understands where im coming from and he understands its hard. =] what a great guy

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