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May Cullen

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03 Apr 1998

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midsummer_dreams asked:

07 Aug 2009

I\'m utterly ashamed of admitting this, but i NEED heelp.

Like i posted a ques before where i'v been down all the time. Well its justgetting worse. I dunno why, i mean its notlike i think im selfish or anything anymore. But everything just pisses me off. I've also self harmed (yes im v.embarassed to saay). ITs nothing big, just a few cuts (er, 20 i think.. but very close together & tiny ones ) . but people who've noticed, iv just made up that the cat scratched me. I know this isnt the most helpful way but pls dont have a go at me. All the time i feel so useless. I start crying randumly.. But then there are times where i just let myself go..i start wanting to do sumthing dangerous, something with a thrill youknow? I just forget who i am & just talk & talk & just be haappy, even though inside im not. i just want danger at times like these.. i want adrenaline. So im like, one minute its like im on a high, & the next i just lock myself & cry. Music doesnt help me anymore, it only makes everything worse. & my lifes pretty good atm. {MORE}

yes my 'rents , ugh it cut off what i said, HATE this new site D:

but i said my parents love me & everything but i cant talk to em widout it. They'd never understand, they've never been through anything like this & they didnt even know bout selfharm untill i asked them bout it & they were like WHAT SELFHARM? i dont even understand myself. wish i could talk to someone who could EMPATHIZE with me in real life, but theres no one relle. im not feeling like IM ALL ALONE & blahblah.. but i still feel fucked up all the time D:

help?, i mean, i cant talk to my 'rents ABOUT it (not 'without' it), ok, the cuts sound a little exagerrated. Most of em are too tiny, & they're only a few big oneess.

i hate to admit it you know. & plz dont say OMG UR ONLY 11 & shit cos that REALLY doesnt help.

Its doesnt matter what age you are. i've been through a lot worse than alot of 14/15 yeared oldds, & besides depression can get you at any agee.

Answers

_lisstheshopaholic_

_lisstheshopaholic_ says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

your 11 right?

dallas_delusional

dallas_delusional says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

turn to Jesus

nana_0601

nana_0601 says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

there must be something that's making you do this, whether it's cuz you don't have anyone to talk to about it , or whatever reason you're uber happy one one moment , then sad. You said you've been through alot , and i'm sure if you just let it out , you'd feel a whole lot better. You're only 11 girly!! You've still got loads of stuff to do D: D: like traveling the world *-* (okay, that's my dream, but still) i'm sure you know self harm isn't going to help...



First off, you just need to stop cutting no matter how small they are. If you hurt yourself, you're pretty much saying in some way, that you hate yourself, you don't like the way you're living or the way things have become . Maybe you should respect yourself and body first (no more cutting) then that'll be a start.



Next off, you've got to find out why you're not happy on the inside. There's always a reason. But , although your life may feel bad, there's still kids who have a worse life. Appreciate the little things =D and if music doesn't help much anymore =x i'd start a band but that's just me, lol . Seriously tho' D: making you're own music is such good stress relief like get a drum set and just go crazy! =x or a guitar.. :) but good luck!! =D

babyblue

babyblue says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

thats true about depression

my friend does this wen shes angry or sad and i sometimez myself get so angry that i wanna hurt somethin but i dont cuz its not right

maybe you should try talkin to your parents ,thats what there there for anyways to help but if you still feel like you cant cuz they won't understand thats okay ,try finding someone you can speak to ,like you said ur not alone

for me i write down what i feel or draw but thts me..

n ya there definitely is a reason why ur doin all that ,could b small on the outside but a big problem on the inside

i usually would say to ppl to not cry wen they have a problem because its not worth it but for you i think you need to cry a bit ,you noe to let it all out

keepin things in does not help at all ,this comin from someone who does it aloot

ignore ur problems sometimes its good to get away from them to look at the good things in life ,like being around people who care about you ,or relaxing ,going out

hope you find someway to help urself....(:

hanlou

hanlou says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

you need to speak to your doctor. Depression is an actual illness. Its a chemical imbalace in the brain its not something you can control yourself. I have had depression for 8 years now it never goes away properly. The doctor can prescribe you medication for this and it really does work. If you dont sort it out it can get really out of hand i didnt leave my house for a year because of it. It doesnt matter if your 11 or 111 anyone at any age can get it. For people who dont have it or havnt had to live with someone who has it do not understand it atall.

_riah_

_riah_ says:

Posted on 08 Aug 2009

Please contact me. I can help you, I know exactly how that feels. I went into depression and I hurt myself. I am better now, there is hope to recover. I was a wreck, I was just like you.



I'm here to listen if you want to talk. I'm here to help.



GodBless.

barbipixi

barbipixi says:

Posted on 08 Aug 2009

girl it's normal to feel like your a bit useless because you don't even really have a life yet. your life consists being taken care of by your rents and trying to survive school



you need to see a counciler and you may even need to try taking some meds :P



i've been though alot and no matter how bad it got i keep a smile and look on the bright side and things always work out. you do have to work to see life from a positive view but it really does help soo much!



and it's hard for us to help you when we don't know y you're so upset.

amaay

amaay says:

Posted on 12 Aug 2009

just let it all out, to anybody, anyone. maybe to one of your friends or a relative. if you let it all out then you will get better, and you should feel better about yourself. also, maybe you could see a doctor about depression, they can help and i'm sure that they will understand, there must be many people that go there for the reason that you have everydaay.

x

midsummer_dreams

midsummer_dreams says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

Yeaaaah

midsummer_dreams

midsummer_dreams says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

im not even a chrisstiaan tho. i dont have a religeon, im too confused about which to pickk.

dallas_delusional

dallas_delusional says:

Posted on 07 Aug 2009

well, buy a Bible, and begin reading Matthew, Luke, and John and stuff. I'm pretty sure Jesus doesn't like you hurting yourself. He loves YOU so much that he died for YOU.

_riah_

_riah_ says:

Posted on 08 Aug 2009

I agree! Jesus will help you. He loves you so much and does not want you to hurt. Open up to him and see it.

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